Watch this clip before you read this note: [This clip has since been removed by Youtube, it is basically a clip of Fox News commentator Cal Thomas making racist remarks about a black female politician. He claims that black women are too often complaining and that they are always angry.]
First and foremost let me say, in any "racial" or ethnic group, any religious,cultural, regional group of people or whatever the case may be, each person within that group is not the same. I may be what Republicans like to call a "New York Times reading latte drinker" ( I actually don't even drink coffee) but that doesn't mean that I don't also go to a church. Every church goer doesn't hate gay people and the list goes on. So I am always offended when anyone makes a generalization about Black people, because of course that is a group that I belong too, but as the infamous T. I says "you don't know me." As each member of this cultural group is different, many of us do identify with one another and we share a struggle (contrary to what some believe, Black women do have a struggle in this country and in this world.) So a lot of black women enjoy Essence or Heart and Soul magazines, as with any demographic, there are things that we have in common.
I am reluctant to say that I am angry about what Cal Thomas said, because that would play right into what he is saying, but I do have a right to be offended when someone makes a rude remark about Black women. But his comment is clearly indicative of the lack of diversity in images within the media. Cal Thomas may have his own biases that prompted him to say what he said, but there are people who agree with him, who get their concept of what a black women is from the media. Black women are a diverse group within ourselves, yet every time I turn on the TV, I see the "Levita Alize Jenkins" types from Steve Harvey, or the "Honey chile" types from the Pine Sol commercials or that silly Dr. Miracles commercial " What you saying about my hair?!" or the "I didnt get no sleep cause of you types" etc. So of course people from the outside looking in are going to assume thats what Black women are, they are not going to understand that many black women are cool calm and collected, they don't snap their necks or beat their kids or wear head rags all day long. Some do all of the above. Some are bohemian and would rather eat Sushi than fried chicken. Some are angry, some are confused, some are oblivious to the struggle of a black women, some don't care. Personally, I am not angry....anger consumes you, and I'm not sick and tired either, I'm too young to be sick and tired. I am vigilant, and working hard to try to right some of the wrongs that exist in our world for black women, and I am firm in my views. I am disgusted at some of the things black people, poor people, latinos, middle eastern people etc have endured at the hands of this country's political and social structure. I have every right to be.
Tuesday, June 2, 2009
April 16th, 2008- Why I'm Voting for Barack Obama
As I sit in my college dorm watching the Democratic debate, I become more and more excited to see what Barack Obama can do for this country. I admire the way he thinks, they way he carrys himself, and they way he, unlike any other politician addresses the issues that are on our minds. After Rev. Wright's comments surfaced, Barack Obama was attacked all over the country, people asked, "how could you sit while this man said what he said?" Regardless of how I feel about Rev. Wright's comments, I have to hand it to Sen Obama for not doing what I know Hillary would have done if she was in the same situation, for not evading the issue, but rather, tackling it head on. I think part of the reason so many people are disenchanted with politicians, is because they always seem to give us the run around. They never seem to want to answer the questions dead on. Obama did. He brought up the elephant in the room, he talked about race. A topic that is in the very heart of this country. Race, and our issues with race, in some aspects, have defined this country. Yet for some reason, everytime one brings it up, they're either pegged as a racist, or someone with a chip on their shoulder. Obama talked about the things that have been in the back of so many of our minds. Thats indicative of a real leader. It is also what sets Obama apart from his Democratic opponent, Hillary Clinton. She's a politician, he's a leader. She has spent more of her campaign beating up on Obama, and trying to find flaws within him, then talking about the real issues that affect our lives, and how she will address them. It sickens me the bickering that Clinton has participated in, she has spent more effort in her campaign complaining about Obama, then handling her own affairs.
But this isn't about Clinton, it's about who can bring my country together. And that is our key issue, unity. I do believe that 95% of politicians who go into public office, had good intentions when they started working in policy. But somehow someway, for Senators specifically, when they get to the capital, they seem to get caught up in the political games that prevent our country from progressing. They won't vote on bills because someone on the "other side of the aile" came up with it. They become caught up in "you scratch my back," "I'll scratch yours" games. They put the needs of American citizens on the backburner, in order to futher their own political career, they don't want to talk about issues that are too sticky, too controversial, if the media isn't talking about it, then they wont talk about it. No one wants to talk about the unequitable drug sentencing, the issues in our judicial system, why, because they're afraid people will think that they are not "tough" on crime. What happened to honest leaders, who took the road less traveled, who talked about the things everyone was running away from, individuals who weren't afraid to be disliked as long as they knew they were doing the right thing, did they ever exist?
I see a true leader in Obama. I am a spiritual person, and I use teachings from The Bible to guide me in my life. I know that the Bible says, "and a child will lead them," (Isaiah 11: 6) The first thing Clinton pointed out with Barack Obama, was is lack of experience in Washington. In the beggining she built her campaign on "experience." But to me, a person who has spent years in Washington DC, working day in and day out with politicians, probably has a lot of backs to scratch, probably has adapted to the ways of politicians. I want a fresh voice, a fresh face, I want someone with a vision, not just an ambition. Both individuals are ambitious, but in my heart, I feel that much of Hillary Clinton's ambition is selfish. She reminds me of every other politician before her. She is caught in the same Baby Boomer divide that Republicans from her generation are caught in. What liberals and conservatives alike fail to understand is that nothing can be accomplished politically, in terms of legislation with out bipartisanship. Not unless you can get a Senate that is 80% Republican or 80% Democrat. So that as it is, we have to work together. It's something will all learned in kindergarden (maybe it's been so long since Hillary has been there that she forgot.) We have to compromise, we have to work together. It seems so basic, but it's essential. It's what I admire about Obama, his belief in working alongside both Republicans and Democrats to get things done. I have yet to hear about Hillary Clinton working in tandem with Republicans (as much as I disagree with them) in order to accomplish something. But it is what this country is about, working with and LISTENING to people that we are in disagreement with.
Hillary called Obama an elitist. (Even though, if we're thinking about tangible displays of elitism, the Clintons are in a VERY elite tax bracket that most Americans cannot even dream of. Whereas Barack and Michelle, relatively speaking are probably the poorest couple in the election- Republican or Democrat.) Hillary has been name calling all along. But this name was interesting to me, because she's been the one picking on him for being such a great orator, for being so intellegent, and I wonder, what has happened to this country, once a country of thinkers and philosphers, that being well spoken, makes you docile? What Obama said about voters from Pennsylvania, was poorly worded, but it made some sense (I'm not a politican, so I can say that.) But what is so ironic about the Hillary campaign jumping on his words, is that she is the one who says, (I'm paraphrasing) 'I'm about action, not words, I'll let Obama be the orator.' But when you think about it, Obama's words here, are not as detrimental as Clinton's actions toward the working class people of Pennsylvania. Hillary has voted in favor of the free trade agreements that sent these people's jobs and livelyhoods abroad. So I'd rather Obama call me 'bitter' than send my job and subsequently my way of putting food on my family's table to Mexico.
Obama made the majority of his campaign funds from students like me sending $5 or $10 to his campaign online. Hillary has collected money from all types of politicans and wealthy individuals, and when the going got tough, she put $5million of her own in the pool. (Obama, like the average American doesnt have 5 million to throw into a campaign) Obama has built his campaign from the ground up, something so rare in todays political machines. Hillary collected her money the same way McCain did, and probably the same way Bush did. Obama can work with politicians to get things done, but he is not one of them.
Obama understands Americans, he understands that this country was built on optimism and hope. People laugh when he uses those words, but when did hope and faith become taboo? When did we become so cyncical and disenchanted that when someone talked about "The Audacity of Hope" we rolled our eyes. Obama is so refreshing, he is the light in the dark room. He is incredibly honest, and incredibly intellegent. Unlike other politicians, he told us from the beggining about his mistakes and flaws (drug use in college) and to me, it made him more human. I want a President who did some dumb things in college, who grew and questioned themself for years, before they got to where they are now. But more importantly, Obama understands and relates to people.
As I read Dreams from My Father, I realized that he has observed people from various walks of life, and paid close attention to their needs and their lifestyles, for anyone skeptical, he can sit down and talk with you, and you will leave convinced. I'll admit, I was doubtful initially. As a black woman who has seen a glimpse of the racism imbedded in this country's psyche, I didn't think he could garner the support from white consituents. But that's what makes him so unique, his ability to relate to people who normally would have nothing to do with a Black man. I am still a John Edwards fan, and I will probably always be. I agree with much of Edwards' policy, but now that he is no longer in the race, it has allowed me to pay closer attention to Obama, I have been priveleged to see his negotiation skills, his wit, his intellegence, and his understanding of real people.
Obama has a dream of bringing this country together, whereas everyone else wants to keep doing things the way they have been done, keep scratching their friends backs, and following the trends. Everytime I hear the Yes We Can speech, I remember that this man is different. He is not like the rest.
But this isn't about Clinton, it's about who can bring my country together. And that is our key issue, unity. I do believe that 95% of politicians who go into public office, had good intentions when they started working in policy. But somehow someway, for Senators specifically, when they get to the capital, they seem to get caught up in the political games that prevent our country from progressing. They won't vote on bills because someone on the "other side of the aile" came up with it. They become caught up in "you scratch my back," "I'll scratch yours" games. They put the needs of American citizens on the backburner, in order to futher their own political career, they don't want to talk about issues that are too sticky, too controversial, if the media isn't talking about it, then they wont talk about it. No one wants to talk about the unequitable drug sentencing, the issues in our judicial system, why, because they're afraid people will think that they are not "tough" on crime. What happened to honest leaders, who took the road less traveled, who talked about the things everyone was running away from, individuals who weren't afraid to be disliked as long as they knew they were doing the right thing, did they ever exist?
I see a true leader in Obama. I am a spiritual person, and I use teachings from The Bible to guide me in my life. I know that the Bible says, "and a child will lead them," (Isaiah 11: 6) The first thing Clinton pointed out with Barack Obama, was is lack of experience in Washington. In the beggining she built her campaign on "experience." But to me, a person who has spent years in Washington DC, working day in and day out with politicians, probably has a lot of backs to scratch, probably has adapted to the ways of politicians. I want a fresh voice, a fresh face, I want someone with a vision, not just an ambition. Both individuals are ambitious, but in my heart, I feel that much of Hillary Clinton's ambition is selfish. She reminds me of every other politician before her. She is caught in the same Baby Boomer divide that Republicans from her generation are caught in. What liberals and conservatives alike fail to understand is that nothing can be accomplished politically, in terms of legislation with out bipartisanship. Not unless you can get a Senate that is 80% Republican or 80% Democrat. So that as it is, we have to work together. It's something will all learned in kindergarden (maybe it's been so long since Hillary has been there that she forgot.) We have to compromise, we have to work together. It seems so basic, but it's essential. It's what I admire about Obama, his belief in working alongside both Republicans and Democrats to get things done. I have yet to hear about Hillary Clinton working in tandem with Republicans (as much as I disagree with them) in order to accomplish something. But it is what this country is about, working with and LISTENING to people that we are in disagreement with.
Hillary called Obama an elitist. (Even though, if we're thinking about tangible displays of elitism, the Clintons are in a VERY elite tax bracket that most Americans cannot even dream of. Whereas Barack and Michelle, relatively speaking are probably the poorest couple in the election- Republican or Democrat.) Hillary has been name calling all along. But this name was interesting to me, because she's been the one picking on him for being such a great orator, for being so intellegent, and I wonder, what has happened to this country, once a country of thinkers and philosphers, that being well spoken, makes you docile? What Obama said about voters from Pennsylvania, was poorly worded, but it made some sense (I'm not a politican, so I can say that.) But what is so ironic about the Hillary campaign jumping on his words, is that she is the one who says, (I'm paraphrasing) 'I'm about action, not words, I'll let Obama be the orator.' But when you think about it, Obama's words here, are not as detrimental as Clinton's actions toward the working class people of Pennsylvania. Hillary has voted in favor of the free trade agreements that sent these people's jobs and livelyhoods abroad. So I'd rather Obama call me 'bitter' than send my job and subsequently my way of putting food on my family's table to Mexico.
Obama made the majority of his campaign funds from students like me sending $5 or $10 to his campaign online. Hillary has collected money from all types of politicans and wealthy individuals, and when the going got tough, she put $5million of her own in the pool. (Obama, like the average American doesnt have 5 million to throw into a campaign) Obama has built his campaign from the ground up, something so rare in todays political machines. Hillary collected her money the same way McCain did, and probably the same way Bush did. Obama can work with politicians to get things done, but he is not one of them.
Obama understands Americans, he understands that this country was built on optimism and hope. People laugh when he uses those words, but when did hope and faith become taboo? When did we become so cyncical and disenchanted that when someone talked about "The Audacity of Hope" we rolled our eyes. Obama is so refreshing, he is the light in the dark room. He is incredibly honest, and incredibly intellegent. Unlike other politicians, he told us from the beggining about his mistakes and flaws (drug use in college) and to me, it made him more human. I want a President who did some dumb things in college, who grew and questioned themself for years, before they got to where they are now. But more importantly, Obama understands and relates to people.
As I read Dreams from My Father, I realized that he has observed people from various walks of life, and paid close attention to their needs and their lifestyles, for anyone skeptical, he can sit down and talk with you, and you will leave convinced. I'll admit, I was doubtful initially. As a black woman who has seen a glimpse of the racism imbedded in this country's psyche, I didn't think he could garner the support from white consituents. But that's what makes him so unique, his ability to relate to people who normally would have nothing to do with a Black man. I am still a John Edwards fan, and I will probably always be. I agree with much of Edwards' policy, but now that he is no longer in the race, it has allowed me to pay closer attention to Obama, I have been priveleged to see his negotiation skills, his wit, his intellegence, and his understanding of real people.
Obama has a dream of bringing this country together, whereas everyone else wants to keep doing things the way they have been done, keep scratching their friends backs, and following the trends. Everytime I hear the Yes We Can speech, I remember that this man is different. He is not like the rest.
April 13th, 2008-As Jill Scott Says-Hate on ME!
"We ask ourselves, Who am I to be gorgeous, talented and fabulous? Actually, who are you not to be? You are a child of God. Your playing sm
all doesn’t serve the world. There’s nothing enlightened about shrinking so that other people won’t feel insecure around you. We are born to make manifest the glory of God that is within us. It’s not just in some of us; it’s in everyone! And as we let our own light shine we unconsciously give other people permission to do the same. And as we are liberated from our own fear, our presence automatically liberates others!”--------Marianne Williamson/Nelson Mandela
I was being nosy and reading through people's facebook statuses, and it's so funny to me how many people--mostly women---mostly black women, have statuses that say something to the degree of, "All these hatin b****es can keep hatin i dont care" or "these girls can keep talking" or "lmao at these hoes" about how they are not letting haters get beneath their skin.
I share that sentiment in not allowing people who don't have something positive or constructive about me, to hurt me. (Mind you, everything someone says about me, does not need to be positive, because that would imply that I am perfect, which is FAR from true..."all have sinned and fallen short of the glory of God"--so some negative things need to be said, it just needs to be constructive, not childish.)But at the same time, why even dignify these people with filling up your status with comments pertaining to them, what I've learned is to keep my mind on God, and growth, and not even make facebook statuses or away messages about it, because something tells me, thats what they are looking for.
But the point of my note is, I feel that often, the hate that we as women experience is deeply rooted in other people being insecure about themselves. But what bothers me, is that so many of us allow the haters to win, and allow them to stop our progress.
I've noticed, that haters,(note: we are all haters sometimes, its so funny how we complain about haters, and then say unconstructive negative things about others, it is not an "us-them" binary when it comes to haters, there is no "other" it is all of us, for each of us that has been "hated on" we have "hated on" someone else.) The people who always have some non-constructive criticism, or some unproductive comment to share, usually their comment relates to someone being "Stuck up" or "full of themselves" or "who does she think she is?" And as a response to that, I see myself subconsciously, and other women subconsciously, deciding their actions and behavior based on how other people may or may not react to it.
How many times have we heard friends say, "I love the way I look in this dress, but I know that girls are gonna say---look at that ho, with the short dress, why she trying to show off?" Then not wear whatever it is because they are afraid people are going to say stuff. But as the quote says, "who am i to be gorgeous...actually who are you not to be?" How many times have people, especially people with stellar GPA's or accomplishments said, "I don't want anyone to know what I got on this test," because what, they're afraid that they are going to get people saying..."Oh he thinks he's this or that because he's got a high GPA." What I often wonder is, why should I have to play down my success, blessings and hard work to make you feel better about yourself? God has blessed me in more ways than I could ever express, so why shouldn't I say that I've won this award?
One of my favorite poets, (A Teach for America alum) Taylor Mali has a poem about how everyone in our generation can't make declarative statements anymore, we always begin
thoughts with "Like" because we don't want to say a bold statement such as, "This is morally wrong" instead we say, 'this is like wrong, because like...' and as he says, we often add inflection to our voices at the statements in a way that makes declarative statements in to questions, so when we say something, "This is a great movie" we add a "like you know?" As if saying, "hey, I need you to agree with me that this is a good movie in order for me to feel good, I'm not sure of my own opinons, so i need you to say yes."
But here I am being a hyppocrite, because I have done every one of these things, I won 4 awards this semester, and not even my closest friends know about all of them. Why, because I've been allowing fear of criticism to prevent me from letting my light shine.
This type of behavior, limiting or downplaying your ideas, success, blessings, talent, beauty or intellegence, in order to prevent people from thinking that you are full of yourself, does no good to our broader community. If you are a state champion swimmer, why should you have to hide your medals? And in this, I am speaking particularly to the Black community. We would not have made the progress we have made now, if people like Dr. King said, "I don't want you to think I'm conceited, so I'm just going to keep my thoughts to myself." Or people like Muhammed Ali did not say "I am the greatest!" Albeit, Ali did have a little conceit in him, but I think I'd rather someone be conceited than someone be a mouse in the corner trying to play it safe and be everyones friend.
God does not look favorably on people who boast, and I know that is something that I try not to do, but he also doesn't look favorably on people who don't act like who they are...children of the most High! In Genesis 32, Jacob fights with the angel all night to get his blessing. Imagine the audacity to say "No you are going to bless me if I have to fight you all night" God obviously rewards that type of audacity. He wants us to say, "I am Ashley Cheree Sawyer child of God, tell me whom shall I fear?" I had a friend tell me that I am too bold, and I thought to myself, should I be timid, should I walk in fear to make other people feel less intimidated by me?
We do have to be considerate of other people, if my brother or sister is starving, it doesnt make sense for me to be bragging about my sandwich. If my friend is broke, it is not kind of me to be talking about the money I have in my pocket. But it does make sense to tell my sister how she can get the bread I got or tell my brother how he can get the job I have. So of course I don't flaunt my bread, but I'm not doing my friend any favors by hiding my bread in my pocket either. There is a balance, and there is a blessing in letting our own success shine.
"And as we let our own light shine we unconsciously give other people permission to do the same. And as we are liberated from our own fear, our presence automatically liberates others!”
So often people are in meetings, and the person conducting the meeting will say, "Does anyone have any suggestions?" And no one will speak up. Yet each person in that meeting is capable and smart enought to contribute something positive toward the growth of their peers. But they stay silent, because they don't want to step on anyone's toes, or suggest something that other people may not agree with. Yet as soon as the meeting is over, the same people who had nothing to say, tell their friends "I think that we should have the event in the morning," or whatever the case may be, but they are so fearful of speaking up, they are so afraid that their own idea, their own suggestion might not be valid, we are afraid that what we have to say is not important enough. This self doubt doesn't lead to growth.
I'm timid in my support of captialism, I agree with some aspects, and disagree with others, but one of the merits of a capitalistic society, is competition. Competition breeds innovation. So if you own a resturant, and I own a resturant, I'm going to do my best to make my food as good as possible, so that patrons will come to mine over yours. Competition for all it's worth, does make people work harder and try to be the best they can be. And I think it should be the same way in other areas, without being arrogant, one should be able to present their ideas, and talents with boldness, so that it encourages other people, in a humane way, to try to improve their ideas and talents. I know women and men with beautiful voices, who are afraid to sing in front of others, not because they don't think they can sing, but because they are afraid it's going to make other people think that they are showing off. Now of course you don't need to be singing all the time, but when someone asks you to, don't be shy, let your light shine.
Walk in authority!
all doesn’t serve the world. There’s nothing enlightened about shrinking so that other people won’t feel insecure around you. We are born to make manifest the glory of God that is within us. It’s not just in some of us; it’s in everyone! And as we let our own light shine we unconsciously give other people permission to do the same. And as we are liberated from our own fear, our presence automatically liberates others!”--------Marianne Williamson/Nelson MandelaI was being nosy and reading through people's facebook statuses, and it's so funny to me how many people--mostly women---mostly black women, have statuses that say something to the degree of, "All these hatin b****es can keep hatin i dont care" or "these girls can keep talking" or "lmao at these hoes" about how they are not letting haters get beneath their skin.
I share that sentiment in not allowing people who don't have something positive or constructive about me, to hurt me. (Mind you, everything someone says about me, does not need to be positive, because that would imply that I am perfect, which is FAR from true..."all have sinned and fallen short of the glory of God"--so some negative things need to be said, it just needs to be constructive, not childish.)But at the same time, why even dignify these people with filling up your status with comments pertaining to them, what I've learned is to keep my mind on God, and growth, and not even make facebook statuses or away messages about it, because something tells me, thats what they are looking for.
But the point of my note is, I feel that often, the hate that we as women experience is deeply rooted in other people being insecure about themselves. But what bothers me, is that so many of us allow the haters to win, and allow them to stop our progress.
I've noticed, that haters,(note: we are all haters sometimes, its so funny how we complain about haters, and then say unconstructive negative things about others, it is not an "us-them" binary when it comes to haters, there is no "other" it is all of us, for each of us that has been "hated on" we have "hated on" someone else.) The people who always have some non-constructive criticism, or some unproductive comment to share, usually their comment relates to someone being "Stuck up" or "full of themselves" or "who does she think she is?" And as a response to that, I see myself subconsciously, and other women subconsciously, deciding their actions and behavior based on how other people may or may not react to it.
How many times have we heard friends say, "I love the way I look in this dress, but I know that girls are gonna say---look at that ho, with the short dress, why she trying to show off?" Then not wear whatever it is because they are afraid people are going to say stuff. But as the quote says, "who am i to be gorgeous...actually who are you not to be?" How many times have people, especially people with stellar GPA's or accomplishments said, "I don't want anyone to know what I got on this test," because what, they're afraid that they are going to get people saying..."Oh he thinks he's this or that because he's got a high GPA." What I often wonder is, why should I have to play down my success, blessings and hard work to make you feel better about yourself? God has blessed me in more ways than I could ever express, so why shouldn't I say that I've won this award?
One of my favorite poets, (A Teach for America alum) Taylor Mali has a poem about how everyone in our generation can't make declarative statements anymore, we always begin
thoughts with "Like" because we don't want to say a bold statement such as, "This is morally wrong" instead we say, 'this is like wrong, because like...' and as he says, we often add inflection to our voices at the statements in a way that makes declarative statements in to questions, so when we say something, "This is a great movie" we add a "like you know?" As if saying, "hey, I need you to agree with me that this is a good movie in order for me to feel good, I'm not sure of my own opinons, so i need you to say yes." But here I am being a hyppocrite, because I have done every one of these things, I won 4 awards this semester, and not even my closest friends know about all of them. Why, because I've been allowing fear of criticism to prevent me from letting my light shine.
This type of behavior, limiting or downplaying your ideas, success, blessings, talent, beauty or intellegence, in order to prevent people from thinking that you are full of yourself, does no good to our broader community. If you are a state champion swimmer, why should you have to hide your medals? And in this, I am speaking particularly to the Black community. We would not have made the progress we have made now, if people like Dr. King said, "I don't want you to think I'm conceited, so I'm just going to keep my thoughts to myself." Or people like Muhammed Ali did not say "I am the greatest!" Albeit, Ali did have a little conceit in him, but I think I'd rather someone be conceited than someone be a mouse in the corner trying to play it safe and be everyones friend.
God does not look favorably on people who boast, and I know that is something that I try not to do, but he also doesn't look favorably on people who don't act like who they are...children of the most High! In Genesis 32, Jacob fights with the angel all night to get his blessing. Imagine the audacity to say "No you are going to bless me if I have to fight you all night" God obviously rewards that type of audacity. He wants us to say, "I am Ashley Cheree Sawyer child of God, tell me whom shall I fear?" I had a friend tell me that I am too bold, and I thought to myself, should I be timid, should I walk in fear to make other people feel less intimidated by me?
We do have to be considerate of other people, if my brother or sister is starving, it doesnt make sense for me to be bragging about my sandwich. If my friend is broke, it is not kind of me to be talking about the money I have in my pocket. But it does make sense to tell my sister how she can get the bread I got or tell my brother how he can get the job I have. So of course I don't flaunt my bread, but I'm not doing my friend any favors by hiding my bread in my pocket either. There is a balance, and there is a blessing in letting our own success shine.
"And as we let our own light shine we unconsciously give other people permission to do the same. And as we are liberated from our own fear, our presence automatically liberates others!”
So often people are in meetings, and the person conducting the meeting will say, "Does anyone have any suggestions?" And no one will speak up. Yet each person in that meeting is capable and smart enought to contribute something positive toward the growth of their peers. But they stay silent, because they don't want to step on anyone's toes, or suggest something that other people may not agree with. Yet as soon as the meeting is over, the same people who had nothing to say, tell their friends "I think that we should have the event in the morning," or whatever the case may be, but they are so fearful of speaking up, they are so afraid that their own idea, their own suggestion might not be valid, we are afraid that what we have to say is not important enough. This self doubt doesn't lead to growth.
I'm timid in my support of captialism, I agree with some aspects, and disagree with others, but one of the merits of a capitalistic society, is competition. Competition breeds innovation. So if you own a resturant, and I own a resturant, I'm going to do my best to make my food as good as possible, so that patrons will come to mine over yours. Competition for all it's worth, does make people work harder and try to be the best they can be. And I think it should be the same way in other areas, without being arrogant, one should be able to present their ideas, and talents with boldness, so that it encourages other people, in a humane way, to try to improve their ideas and talents. I know women and men with beautiful voices, who are afraid to sing in front of others, not because they don't think they can sing, but because they are afraid it's going to make other people think that they are showing off. Now of course you don't need to be singing all the time, but when someone asks you to, don't be shy, let your light shine.
Walk in authority!
January 2007 Blog-Baby Steps
I guess I am sort of subversive, in that I don't always do what everyone else does, and I always have a way of analyzing everything, including the tradition of New Years resolutions. I think the idea is pretty good in principle, like we should always take time out to think about what we're doing wrong, and how we can improve going forward. That's wonderful, but lets be real, how many of us remember what our new years resolution was for 2006? I sure as hell don't. So what sense does it make to do the same thing the following year, to set a goal that we'll probably forget about in 2 months, and that often we don't achieve. Plus, who told us that we could handle 365 days? Why are we trying to transform our habits, our weight, our attitude, or whateva over the course of a year, to me that sounds like an excuse to procrastinate. (something i'm REALLY good at) "It's like okay so i said i was going to start saving money in 07, but i dont have to do it in january, why not feb. yea then I'll make a budget" So this year, I've decided to make baby steps, rather than make a new years resolution, I'm making new months resolutions. Why should i wait til the end of the year to clean up my act? This way I'm constantly checking myself, 12 times a year, constantly looking to improve, and i have less time to procrastinate, and a more reasonably sized task.This month's resolution, is to be more assertive, hopefully I can carry it with me throughout 07, but for now, I'm just thinking about Jan. Remember: baby steps...I realize that often I let ppl walk over me, I let people say rude things to me, do rude things to me, or that I am not always myself because I'm afraid to offend anyone or whatever. So for the month of January, I'll speak my mind. Speaking my mind doesn't mean I have to be rude, or snotty either, it means I have to be respectful and tasteful, but make it clear I'm no one's "bitch." I feel like a lot of times I have these long grudges against people, and can't even remember why, and its probably because they did something to me, and I was too passive to speak up, and I let it slide, but over time it built up this resentment in me, but I can't even tell that person why I'm mad at them. I should've addressed it when it first came up. I'm too nice, to people who arent nice to me, I let people borrow things, use my space etc and don't say "hey"thats enough, I need my shit back. Why am I so afraid of losing so called friends or whatever, if they can't handle me being real with them, maybe I don't need them around. I look back on how many times I've let people take soo much from me, literally, physically and figuratively and I never spoke up and said "hey i don't want this" or "im not feeling u like that" or "i need that, i dont feel like sharing it" or "im not ready, fall back/" Once again, these things don't need to be said in a nasty way, because when u speak to people wit respect, they generally respond a lot better. But somethings need to be said. So this is for anyone whose not said what they felt because they were afraid to hurt someones feelings, or who wasnt themselves around some people, or who let someone in their lives get away with too much for too damned long:"Be who you are and say what you feel, because the people who mind dont matter, and the people who matter don't mind." For my true friends and fam who love me like cooked food, thanks for respecting my realness, and for encouraging me to be bold and do what I need to do for me. In the end, I'm not selfish, but I've just got to be me, cool calm collected, kind and sweet, but "make me unselfish, WITHOUT BEING BLIND"Happy January
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